Jinger Duggar’s Honest Quotes About Her ‘Cult-Like’ Growing Up

Jinger Duggar was honest about the challenges of growing up in the TLC spotlight — and breaking away from the conservative teachings of her childhood.

Jinger is one Jim Bob again Michelle Duggar19 children raised as followers of the Institute in Basic Life Principles, a grassroots organization founded by the controversial leader. Bill Gothard. Fans watched as Jinger and her siblings went about their daily lives 19 Children and countingwhich ran from 2008 to 2015, and a spinoff The Countdown Continueswhich was broadcast from 2015 to 2021.

After leaving the world of reality TV, Jinger began to develop her own views on faith with the help of her husband, Jeremy VuoloHe married her in 2016. “Thank you for my growth. It wasn’t perfect … but at the end of the day, I’m thankful for my parents,” Jinger said on the “Unplanned” podcast in June 2024. “I love them, we have our differences, everything is wrong between us, but I think at the end of the day, I love them and I know they know that.”

Jinger previously talked about her coming of age in her books The Hope We Hold again Quite the reliefexplaining the issues of his religious background and the different views he has now. His latest memoir, People’s pleaser, which will begin to appear in January 2025, will deepen the “not so healthy path” he was on.

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Telling his story. Jinger Duggar grew up in the spotlight, but there were still plenty of TLC fans who didn’t know about her life — until now. The 19 Kids and Counting alum, 29, released her book Becoming Free Indeed: My Story of Disentangling Faith from Fear on Tuesday, January 31. Her memoir reveals her staunch Christian. […]

“I realized that I am a people pleaser since I was young. … There [is] people-pleasers that can be seen in everybody’s life, every day and I think that’s why now is the time to write this book,” he said on the “Jinger & Jeremy” podcast in September 2024. “It’s such a problem and it’s always going to be a problem.”

Scroll down for Jinger’s candid comments about her unusual upbringing:

Love Notes From Prison

Being part of a famous family came with a few surprises. “Boys used to write to my sisters in prison. It was crazy,” Jinger said on the “Dinner Party With Jeremy Fall” podcast in July 2021. “We were always getting letters in the mail and it was like, ‘Oh, who’s this time? Oh, Jana’s, oh, Jessa’s.’ … It was impressive to think that someone thought they were going to come into your life and marry you, like, they already proposed in their letters.”

Jinger added that some of the inmates may have believed the suggestions were “legitimate,” saying, “I understand how someone would think, ‘Oh, I know you well because I watched you when you were young,’ so they think that.” that there is a relationship where there is none. It’s like, a one-dimensional thing. “

‘Cult-Like’ Faith

Jinger was specifically told Us in January 2023 that he “definitely” realized that his religious upbringing was “religion-like in many ways,” adding, “It was built on fear, manipulation, control and superstition, so all those things combine with how difficult it is for children.” walking or old people walking – anyone, really. … Once you have heard the teachings, you must not depart from them.”

In interview no People that same month, Jinger said she was often “crippled by anxiety” growing out of “fear and superstition” fueled by Gothard’s “dangerous” teachings. “I was afraid of the outside world,” he admitted. “The teaching I grew up under was dangerous, damaging and had lasting consequences.”

Jinger also reflected on the nature of IBLP in his 2025 book, People Pleasersaying that he was taught “a kind of pseudo-Christianity built on the appearance of holiness.” He continued, “It was so important to support this appearance that many underlying problems, struggles, and sins were pushed back, never discussed, never confronted, except in a twisted form of unresolved ‘confession’.” problems. If you messed up in that setting, you were in danger of losing your community by not living up to the Gothard values.”

Bond and his sister

In his 2023 book, Quite the reliefJinger revealed that of all her nine sisters, she feels the most connected to Jessa. “He is my closest relative in age, only 13 months older than me. He is the fifth and I am the sixth of 19 Duggar children,” Jinger wrote. “When I was growing up, Jessa and I were together all the time. Even though all the Duggar girls shared a room, I often felt like I was the only one with Jessa. Our beds were next to each other throughout my childhood.”

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Being on TV

Jinger and her siblings first appeared on television in 2004 19 Children and counting first aired in 2008. “I look back at those years and I’m very grateful for the opportunities I was able to have,” he said. Us January 2023 when we think about growing in the physical space. “Since we are traveling all over the world, there are things that we would not be able to do as a big family. At the same time, I can say that I saw them, too, those challenges [that came with it].”

At the time, Jinger explained that she and Vuolo were “talking” about whether they wanted to raise their children in public. (The couple welcomed daughters Felicity and Evangeline in 2018 and 2020, revealing in 2024 that child 3 is on the way.)

“I have spent most of my life on TV. … That was my childhood,” he said Us. “Like, that’s all I knew. I played with boom mics and all that, but [my kids are] just so you don’t get used to it. So it’s nice to see you.”

Family Laws

Fans have long been intrigued by the Duggar family’s strict expectations for their children under IBLP teachings. “I thought I should only wear skirts and dresses to please God. Music with drums, places I go to or bad friendships can all cause damage,” said Jinger People January 2023.

During an appearance on the “Random” podcast the following year, Jinger admitted that many of the “man-made” rules are “absurd,” such as not being allowed to wear T-shirts. “If you have a regular shirt, you are allowed to roll up your sleeves,” he explained. “But you can’t buy a t-shirt with the sleeves off.”

Dating guidelines were also set, with dates requiring an escort. “You know, you can’t kiss before you’re married, you can’t hold hands… [but] I don’t see that in the word of God,” said Jinger Us in January 2023, revealing how he plans to broach the subject with his children. “I don’t think dating is a word we’re going to use at all because I don’t think that’s the only way to find a mate – or the best way – at all.

Living With 18 Siblings

Jinger admitted on “Random” in June 2024 that she was “scared” of the pressures of being “many.” [kids] as much as possible” before becoming a parent. He remembered that he had to take care of his two siblings when he was young.

“I think parents should take care of their children. If you have them, you should take care of them. Children can help, learn to be responsible in other ways, but maybe not in the mother’s aspects of what mothers or fathers should do,” she said. “You have all this inequality of raising children. I think I’ve seen that a lot on the show and I think that’s unhealthy. “

Jinger also recalled IBLP teachings affecting her family’s life in unexpected ways. “We will never do organized games because we are afraid of the influences around us,” he said. “So we’re going to make it a family game in the community … and we’re all going to play it together. … Looking back, I’m like, ‘Oh, I wish I had maybe had more opportunities to explore what I was really interested in that way.’”

Adequate Food

During an August 2024 episode of the “Jinger & Jeremy” podcast, Jinger spoke candidly about growing up with her 18 siblings. “I remember a few times when we were very young some of my siblings would take their food, take their plate of food — get ready for this, it’s disgusting — in the bathroom,” he recalls. “They would take it and put it on the bathroom counter, and my mom was like, ‘Don’t do that.’ They would say, ‘They will eat it.’

Jinger added, “That’s what they were really thinking, ‘I can’t eat my food because someone is going to eat it and we might not have enough food for a few seconds today.’

No Controversy

In People’s pleaser, Jinger wrote that she feels “naturally strong enough to find stressful arguments, but I also deal with my years of upbringing.” According to Jinger, the life of the Duggars was “somewhat like what you would see on television; we just didn’t argue, disagree, or get involved in conflicts,” adding that Jim Bob and Michelle “set an example for us by consistently and gently creating a completely conflict-free environment.”

Looking back, this practice came with its pros and cons. “Conflicts were to be avoided at all costs, which meant that, in many cases, you would have to postpone any quarrels or disagreements in order to keep the peace. For some of my siblings, based on their personalities, that was probably too difficult for them. … To me? It was nice to be at home where non-confrontation was expected. It doesn’t mean I’m healthy, but mostly my jam,” he wrote.

Learning to Understand Pop Culture

Jinger revealed to People Pleaser that her “very sheltered background” often made her feel like she “didn’t speak the same language” when it came to pop culture.

“I saw very few films and listened to very little music apart from classical songs as a child. So there are times when I’m chatting and laughing with the group when someone brings up a line from a movie or bursts into a famous song, and I’m left thinking, ‘Huh?’” he wrote. “It’s always weird to me, I feel like I’m the only one who doesn’t get it.”

Without feeling behind the curve, Jinger noted that she happily entered the series of “Oscar winners, comedy. [and] nightmares” with the help of her husband. “There are so many good movies I’m seeing for the first time,” he wrote.

Swimming in Skirts

Jinger opened up about some unintended consequences of modest dress in her 2025 memoir, revealing, “Long skirts weren’t designed for swimming lessons.”

He admitted: “Another way of saying ‘long-skirted swimmer’ is ‘drowning.’ And because long skirts were the only swimming fashion I had as a child, and because I had something of an aversion to drowning, swimming skills weren’t something I picked up at the time.”